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oookay, so after recovering from the lax/purging thing, I rehydrated myself and decided that I am better than that. I know starving has always been my M.O. but I had eaten more that day and felt gross. mostly I don't condone those behaviors, nor partake in them...

which is good because I had given myself a small abrasion on my esophagus plus heartburn after purging episode. which was lame. it finally feels better.

woke up, and down to 1*6.5 today... lost another inch around my waist, hips, boobs, thighs, and butt. I could do without loosing boobage, but part of me just remembers that they are like, pure fat.

still not brave enough to try on some of the pants I couldn't fit into like a month or so ago, even though I've lost at least 10 lbs... i'll wait til I get in the 120's I think.

i'm feeling okay, think i'm going to fast today seeing as it's 2:30pm and I haven't eaten yet... i'm reading a book called "fasting rediscovered" and it's really good.

going to try and update more regularly... it's not that I don't have time to, it's just sometimes, especially if I haven't lost weight, that I feel like I don't want to talk :(


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 12th, 2015 12:45 pm (UTC)
i'm so sorry about the lax/purge episode, i've never done lax but i def have lotsssss of history with purging, it's done quite a number on my body, more than starving. i know how hard it is when you eat and it just feels like...agh, that agonizing feeling of needing to NOT feel it at all, it's horrifying and i'm sorry you experienced that.

reading your post inspired me to fast today, i think i'll just have water and a few glasses of wine because i sure as hell need it. i want to fast until the 15, let's see how i do this time :)
May. 11th, 2015 08:19 pm (UTC)
Hey up totally get it. I'm fasting ATM too. Hate the laxative stuff as I have done it a while back, but just can't bare it. Much better to fast. Luckily my purging has stopped for a while as that also doesn't give me the same results! Looking for a Ana buddy by any chance?
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )



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